I just had this conversation yesterday. Someone asked if I would open another location and I said I had tried and it wasn’t the end all be all answer I thought it would be. It was expensive and I didn’t feel I could spread myself out that way. There’s this push to expand because of the reasons you outlined, and I think it’s also intrinsic in capitalism: always pushing for more profits, more money, more access to capital. I’m not good at capitalism and frankly, I hate it, I just try to play the only game we have here. I wish I had had this self-actualization prior to open a second store. Once again you are wise beyond your years Ashley.
I noticed you were missing in December and I thought, good for her!
I love how insightful this realization is — it's almost assumed that once you open a shop, you're supposed to want more, you're supposed to want to open more locations, but why? If your beautiful little shop works and sustains your life, then what's wrong with that? I'm glad you're thriving within the spaces you've set for yourself, and I hope you had a good holiday!!!
Welcome back! I definitely did miss you in my inbox but I fully understand the feeling of life just being too full and needing to dial back on some aspects. I hope you had a great month focusing on Grad School stuff!
I think about the notion of "enough" all the time. I see lots of people in my life constantly wanting more. My partner always wants more guitar pedals (how many does one need?), my mom buys new furniture for her home what feels like every couple months, my brother has an unfathomable sneaker wall. With material stuff I especially think about the capitalism and consumerism aspects and how that's terrible for the planet, but I also personally get very overwhelmed if there are too many "things" around me.
The idea of wanting more of that sort of intangible "growth" is something I've been slowly letting go of more and more each year. It especially hit me when there was a possible opportunity for my boss to receive a promotion and me to take her role. I looked at her responsibilities and looked at mine and realized that I really liked doing what I was doing. If growth meant leaving the stuff I was doing behind, then I didn't want that. That was what really pushed me to remove myself from the "climb the corporate ladder" mentality and consider that I could be happier at a "lower" level and making enough money to live decently.
There's so much maturity and intention in this message. If your current job suits you and meets your needs, I think it's totally fine to stay put! It's weird we consider stasis and contentment as flaws when they're really incredible displays of being able to synthesize our surroundings and understand our goals and skill sets. Thank you for sharing this and happy to be back! Happy new year to you, Eden! I always love seeing your comments.
Happy New Year! A great piece today. “What’s enough?” Is something I think about a lot, too. I don’t need much. I just need enough. I realize “enough” is different for each individual but for me it’s not a fat bank account, but a quality of life where I have time to do and explore other things than just work (although I do love my work), and enough to share with others who are in need.
Thank you Kate! I hope you had a restful end of year! I think you're so spot on, and I like that your goalposts aren't super concrete (which also feels like another trap because goalposts move all the time), but can be traced to quality of life measures. What makes a good life for each individual, and how can we work backward from that intention? You're so on point, as always!
This piece resonates with me deeply and now I’m wondering about growth vs. expansion. Like maybe going deep vs growing taller/bigger? So much juicy to ponder. And you reminded me of a time several years ago when I was speaking with a leadership coach about AI in HR processes and thought to ask something along the lines of “is it always better to be more efficient?”
Coming from a stint supporting Lean culture in a manufacturing organization, this question felt radical and the coach had been operating under the assumption that more efficient is always better of course. Now don’t get me wrong, nothing irks me more than having to do rework- and I often get annoyed at very manual, tedious processes. But I also think it’s increasingly valuable to ask why, and not barrel ahead with growth or expansion *just* for expansion’s sake and to keep the end in mind.
Agreed, and I actually think growth and expansion are two totally different things! Growth can be giving employees a raise, growth can be making your processes more efficient — just because we don't see it doesn't mean it doesn't represent a new way of thinking of things, or progression towards something more sustainable. I love your note and thank you for sharing it!
Really love this and agree with you about having intention before just setting the goals we're "supposed to set." I've been adjusting to a full time work schedule (started in May) and am really proud of how things are going there but it means have less time to grow the newsletter. A lot of this resonates.
This is great – refreshing, thoughtful, and so darn relatable. I like this approach and hope to find a little more clarity and spaciousness through asking these kind of questions. Thanks for sharing this, Ashley :) I lol'd at the end when you apologized for ghosting your readers...I love/hate how I always feel like I need to make this big announcement before skipping a week or month or year of content. As IF I am that special and important to all of these people lolol v relatable xo
I DEFINITELY suffered from this mindset before (thinking a shop would fall apart without me lol). But there's something so huge and really tiny about stepping back and realizing you're like, insignificance? Not that we don't matter, but often we're consumed with the things people think of us that are just passing thoughts.
Hey Ashley, it's great you took time for yourself and your other priorities. When a project is paused, regardless for how long, I believe one is more prone to welcome your awaited return, than complain about your absence. That's at least what I felt when I saw this newsletter in my inbox. I myself took a short break from my podcast and newsletter, so I totally get it: it felt great and now I look forward to starting again! Happy new year!
I just had this conversation yesterday. Someone asked if I would open another location and I said I had tried and it wasn’t the end all be all answer I thought it would be. It was expensive and I didn’t feel I could spread myself out that way. There’s this push to expand because of the reasons you outlined, and I think it’s also intrinsic in capitalism: always pushing for more profits, more money, more access to capital. I’m not good at capitalism and frankly, I hate it, I just try to play the only game we have here. I wish I had had this self-actualization prior to open a second store. Once again you are wise beyond your years Ashley.
I noticed you were missing in December and I thought, good for her!
I love how insightful this realization is — it's almost assumed that once you open a shop, you're supposed to want more, you're supposed to want to open more locations, but why? If your beautiful little shop works and sustains your life, then what's wrong with that? I'm glad you're thriving within the spaces you've set for yourself, and I hope you had a good holiday!!!
Thank you!!! Thank you so much and I hope you had an excellent holiday and restful time to yourself!
Welcome back! I definitely did miss you in my inbox but I fully understand the feeling of life just being too full and needing to dial back on some aspects. I hope you had a great month focusing on Grad School stuff!
I think about the notion of "enough" all the time. I see lots of people in my life constantly wanting more. My partner always wants more guitar pedals (how many does one need?), my mom buys new furniture for her home what feels like every couple months, my brother has an unfathomable sneaker wall. With material stuff I especially think about the capitalism and consumerism aspects and how that's terrible for the planet, but I also personally get very overwhelmed if there are too many "things" around me.
The idea of wanting more of that sort of intangible "growth" is something I've been slowly letting go of more and more each year. It especially hit me when there was a possible opportunity for my boss to receive a promotion and me to take her role. I looked at her responsibilities and looked at mine and realized that I really liked doing what I was doing. If growth meant leaving the stuff I was doing behind, then I didn't want that. That was what really pushed me to remove myself from the "climb the corporate ladder" mentality and consider that I could be happier at a "lower" level and making enough money to live decently.
There's so much maturity and intention in this message. If your current job suits you and meets your needs, I think it's totally fine to stay put! It's weird we consider stasis and contentment as flaws when they're really incredible displays of being able to synthesize our surroundings and understand our goals and skill sets. Thank you for sharing this and happy to be back! Happy new year to you, Eden! I always love seeing your comments.
Happy New Year! A great piece today. “What’s enough?” Is something I think about a lot, too. I don’t need much. I just need enough. I realize “enough” is different for each individual but for me it’s not a fat bank account, but a quality of life where I have time to do and explore other things than just work (although I do love my work), and enough to share with others who are in need.
Thank you Kate! I hope you had a restful end of year! I think you're so spot on, and I like that your goalposts aren't super concrete (which also feels like another trap because goalposts move all the time), but can be traced to quality of life measures. What makes a good life for each individual, and how can we work backward from that intention? You're so on point, as always!
This piece resonates with me deeply and now I’m wondering about growth vs. expansion. Like maybe going deep vs growing taller/bigger? So much juicy to ponder. And you reminded me of a time several years ago when I was speaking with a leadership coach about AI in HR processes and thought to ask something along the lines of “is it always better to be more efficient?”
Coming from a stint supporting Lean culture in a manufacturing organization, this question felt radical and the coach had been operating under the assumption that more efficient is always better of course. Now don’t get me wrong, nothing irks me more than having to do rework- and I often get annoyed at very manual, tedious processes. But I also think it’s increasingly valuable to ask why, and not barrel ahead with growth or expansion *just* for expansion’s sake and to keep the end in mind.
Agreed, and I actually think growth and expansion are two totally different things! Growth can be giving employees a raise, growth can be making your processes more efficient — just because we don't see it doesn't mean it doesn't represent a new way of thinking of things, or progression towards something more sustainable. I love your note and thank you for sharing it!
Really love this and agree with you about having intention before just setting the goals we're "supposed to set." I've been adjusting to a full time work schedule (started in May) and am really proud of how things are going there but it means have less time to grow the newsletter. A lot of this resonates.
I know you've been working this new job for a bit, but congrats in general on adjusting to a new pace of life. I'm glad this hit for you.
This is great – refreshing, thoughtful, and so darn relatable. I like this approach and hope to find a little more clarity and spaciousness through asking these kind of questions. Thanks for sharing this, Ashley :) I lol'd at the end when you apologized for ghosting your readers...I love/hate how I always feel like I need to make this big announcement before skipping a week or month or year of content. As IF I am that special and important to all of these people lolol v relatable xo
I DEFINITELY suffered from this mindset before (thinking a shop would fall apart without me lol). But there's something so huge and really tiny about stepping back and realizing you're like, insignificance? Not that we don't matter, but often we're consumed with the things people think of us that are just passing thoughts.
Hey Ashley, it's great you took time for yourself and your other priorities. When a project is paused, regardless for how long, I believe one is more prone to welcome your awaited return, than complain about your absence. That's at least what I felt when I saw this newsletter in my inbox. I myself took a short break from my podcast and newsletter, so I totally get it: it felt great and now I look forward to starting again! Happy new year!
Thank you! Your notes are always so encouraging and I appreciate your kindness!! I love that you also took a break! We all deserve rest!
This makes me think of writer Edward Abbey's quote: "Growth for growth's sake is the ideology of the cancer cell."
Omg this is a haunting quote